Baddest Boots
by RhiannonNymph
Summary: Cause really it's all about who's more afraid of losing what... a sort of Halloween thing
1. OOO, Scary

**DISCLAIMER:** I own nothing, it all belongs to Joss, and I'm merely borrowing his creation for my own twisted pleasure. Also I'm making no money.

This is my attempt at a Halloween piece; I've never done a holiday story before so I hope this doesn't suck. Season wise, this happens sometime after _Trash_, but before _The Message_.

Enjoy.

--

BADDEST BOOTS

_Serenity_ set down on Persephone. Little boutiques that sold just about anything you could think to sell, lined both sides of the dusty, crowded streets; and in the midst of the throngs of people where those that had the push cart stores, rolling over people's feet, shouting in English and Chinese about the things they had.

Here Malcom Reynolds was going to try and fence the Lassiter, the forerunner of modern laser technology. It wasn't going to be an easy thing to get done. It was a famous piece of metal and wire, and besides the big price tag, who's gonna bye a piece of equipment they can't show anybody?

Well it wasn't of much concern to Simon Tam, _Serenity's_ only doctor. He was out here, wondering a bit, for reasons of his own. Reasons he'd taken to the Captain to offer as not only a point of bonding, but as a show of a freer, fun loving side, and a'course Mal wasn't one to turn down a good time, specially when there wasn't any harm in it. Well…maybe later there'd be harm, namely to Simon, but he figured he'd deal with it when it got there. He _was _the only doctor for the crew of nine.

He knew Persephone to be a source of the less than savory type, and there for home to more disreputable men, stores, and even a black market. Which isn't where he was headed, he wasn't going to go quite that far; he just needed the stores.

This brought him to his current location: Bartholomew's Bin. Sounded more like a bar to Simon, but he'd been told this was the place to do his shopping, so he went in.

--

After another deal gone sour, Mal, returned to his ship; the Lasitder still in hand and burning a hole in his hull. He went right on down to his quarters and put the useless weapon away.

Least he had better things to look forward to once they'd reached the relative safety of the black. He knew it would do nothing but put Simon in a tougher spot then the boy was already in, but he wanted to throw a Halloween thing, he'd managed to get the whole crew behind it too, excluding a few people. They may be less inclined to help the scheming doctor, but they sure wouldn't be missing out on the action.

Mal smiled to himself, it would be quite a thing to see. He climbed up the ladder to the hallway above, and headed up to the bridge. Wasn't sure if anyone'd be there, he'd told 'em all they was free to roam about for a bit, but to be back in a few hours time.

Sure enough the bridge was empty, Wash never missed an opportunity to go planet side, or spend time with his wife for that matter. He figured the only souls left on _Serenity_ was his own self, Book and River.

He leaned back in the chair, where he rarely sat, and waited for them to return.

--

Later on, after they'd taken in all the parts and food they'd bought and headed back to vastness of the 'verse, Simon had come to Mal and told him what he'd found, and his plan for using it.

Course Mal knew why the boy was doin' it, wasn't sure how the kid had found out but it was a fair bet to say his sister had something to do it with.

And Simon, being the educated man that he was didn't let Mal down with his plan. He really did have an evil mind when he was up to it, didn't never miss a detail. It was sure to be a memory to last the ages and anything else that may come their way.

--

Jayne had been in bed all'a fifteen minutes it seemed 'for the ship shook like she was trying to loose her self from a net. He wrapped his arms back around his pillow and dug his head on in, let Wash worry 'bout the flying, it's his job.

But then when Wash's voice came echoin' down to him through the speaker system, Jayne forgot all 'bout sleep. Shaking was something he could sleep through – dying wasn't.

Reavers.

He sat bolt upright, and pulled down the flimsy cloth he had covering his weapons…or at least where his weapons shoulda been.

"What the hell?" he jumped off his bed and move over to the truck where he kept his others. He sure as hell didn't know where everything had got to but everything couldn't be disappeared…only they was. Every gun, every knife, all of it was missing. "GORRAMIT!" he shouted. He couldn't even find his holster…or Vera.

This was no time for someone to playing with him, and if they lived he'd take it out their hides. Reavers wasn't no way for a man to die. There was a few guns out in the cargo bay. Sure hoped he made it that far.

He climbed out his room and looked up to the bridge, it was sealed off. Meaning Wash was there still trying to fly them out but also that the worst had happened and they all might as well just give up – they'd been boarded.

He made his way toward the kitchen. It was eerie and quite. Where was everyone? He didn't hear no screamin' so maybe they hadn't been boarded…yet. And then he tossed that thought when one them creatures came tearing through the kitchen, coming right at him, knockin' all sorts of stuff over in the process. Jayne slid the door closed with a loud click and locked it.

He supposed that'd at least buy Wash a bit more time, and he still had another way to the cargo bay. To bad for him he didn't take a second look at that Reaver, he might have noticed that when it pulled at it's flesh there was some sort'a smile there. And Reavers don't smile none.

He made it to the cargo bay with out seeing another one, but soon as he set foot at the top of the steps and on the platform, there one was, looking to lift it's self a gun.

Stupid things them Reavers are though, the ain't got no though process, just some sadistic primal urge, so when it couldn't open the locker it turned to Jayne, must'a smelt the fear. Again Jayne wondered where in the hell anybody was. He turned to go back down the stairs, and that was a no go, here came one of them, walkin' all crazy and lopsided up the steps.

Maybe he'd get lucky and they'd be all full on the doc and his moon pie sister, too bad Reavers didn't take no prisoners. He had one more out – the other way turn around and run up them catwalks and pray to God he runs into someone with a weapon. Only he was pretty sure he'd be dead before that.

Option three was 'bout as productive as running into a meat grinder. He was surrounded, they was closing in on him all slow like, savorin' the feel, lettin' him know what was a'coming. But thank the lord almighty there was Mal across the way, gun in hand and takin' aim!

Only thing was…well, there was a Reaver coming up on Mal. Jayne yelled to him and Mal turned around just in time to get a lot Reaver in the face, he yelled as he went down under the things body.

Then the lights flickered, and the ship shook some more and then the lights were gone. Then the emergency lights kicked in, the two or three there was, left just enough light to see his death comin'. An' to make matters worse, there was banging on the hatch door. There was more on the way in, wouldn't be long now 'fore they was overrun and any one who ain't dead will be. Jayne was sure he had to be dreamin', wasn't no way this was like to happen to them, they'd outrun Reavers before, wasn't no call to be done in this time.

By now Mal had stopped yelling, he hadn't even got to fire a shot at the thing that'd ate him. It was a dream, had to be, no way Mal would go down with out a shot. Jayne remembered something he'd heard along time ago, about not being able to get hurt in a dream, so he kicked his shin up into the bars of the railing, and crumpled to the floor holding his leg.

"Gah!" they was getting closer now, and gun or not he'd fight 'fore they tasted him. Even knowing that he could hide the fear on his face, you didn't see a Reaver and pretend it didn't scare you to death. He didn't understand why they was taking their sweet old time getting to him, so he figured he'd give himself a last ditch effort and try to run right past their slowness. When he went to stand back up, he couldn't. Some mighty fierce pain shot up his leg. "Gorramit Jayne, why you gotta kick so hard…"

They was less than three feet away now so Jayne did the only thing he could think of. He prayed.

"God…don't kick me out, give me a chance to explain. I done a lot a things bad, but I done some good too..." the moved closer still, and he sped up, "Ain't got much time. I'm sorry for all them terrible things I done, real sorry-" they were on him! "Oh GOD!" his arms reached up to cover his face, it was a natural reaction, he'd forgotten all about fighting them.

He waited for the feel of their claws and teeth to dig into his flesh, and then he waited some more. He moved his arms just slightly to see the lights was back on and three of the most hideous faces stood over him.

Simon, River and Kaylee.

"What the…" and they broke out in laughter, and on the rafters behind him Mal stood with Wash, who'd also removed his horrible mask. Zoë was coming down from the bridge, a smile on her face too, and Book and Inara were emerging from the other side of the opening hatch.

"Kaylee you got all that on the capture, right?" Zoë asked from across the way, Wash's disfigured arm over her shoulders.

"Sure did." Kaylee smiled into the capture, reliving every terrifying moment Jayne had just experienced.

"What the hell's wrong with ya'll?" Jayne shouted, standing up and bearing the now dull ache in his leg. He was furious. He pushed past the three in front of him, making sure to hit the doctor the hardest, this whole thing reeked of him. He went down the steps, "I want my weapons back, NOW!" He shouted back. Simon followed him down.

"Can't really say you didn't deserve it. You've done worse to myself, and others I'm sure." Jayne turned on the young man, walking up to him and hovering over him.

"This some revenge then? Takin' a man's fears and making light of them? Boy you're lucky I didn't shoot you dead where you stood. Luckier I ain't doin' now. Best watch your back from now on son, this ain't over."

He limped away from him. Simon had never seen him so angry, and he sure knew something was on store for him, something worse.

As Jayne's feet disappeared up the steps, Simon thought maybe he had gone a little far. Reavers were everyone worst nightmare and no one should have to deal with their friends making them live it. He knew he'd have to apologize, but he had to wait till the man calmed down.

Could be a long wait.

--

Ok, I realize this is less Halloween then it should be, but I think the terrifying Reaver deal is Halloween enough. I originally meant for Simon to come up with a haunted house of sorts to get back a Jayne for the Ariel incident, but eh…didn't happen. There is a second part to this, so keep and eye out!

Oh and PLEASE REVIEW! I'll love you forever! (does that work past the age of five?) Do it anyway!

Oh yes, HAPPY HALLOWEEN!


	2. A Dish Best Served

Enjoy it. :)

--

BADDEST BOOTS: A DISH BEST SERVED

It had been nearly two weeks since Simon had pulled his prank/revenge on the ships big mercenary. Two weeks where every time they passed each other Jayne'd be sure to hit the man in some fashion; even tripped him once or well, it was more than that. Two weeks they hadn't said a word to each other. Silent stares from Jayne, worried glances from Simon; he knew something was coming.

Truth be told Jayne's anger wasn't only for the doc. He hardly spoke more'n a few words to anybody else.

The crew still laughed about it from time to time, making sure that Jayne was outta ear shot. They ain't never heard a man pray so fast in all their lives, 'course was to be expected – facing Reavers with no weapons and a hurt leg.

In about three hours they'd be setting down on the next rock, in an ever decreasing list, to try and get themselves rid of that Lassiter they'd picked up a ways back. If ever there was a more appropriate time to apologize, Simon couldn't think.

"Jayne?" he said to the man back. He was cleanin' his mighty large collection of guns again and at the sound'a Simon's voice he stopped.

"Ain't the best place for you to be alone now is it?" he went back to his guns.

Simon cleared his throat and went on, "I just wanted to apologize. I may have gone a bit far. Reavers are…everyone's worst nightmare. And I didn't mean to…well I don't know…if I hurt your feelings…" he trailed of uncertainly.

"Ain't got no feelings."

"Of course, I just was covering my bases, um, well I'm sorry. I let my anger get the better of me, and I wont do it again." He started to walk away.

"This don't make everything ok Doc. I'm still coming for you." Again he didn't look up, or even break in his efforts with his gun, nor did the threat in his voice fail to scare the doctor.

Jayne wasn't someone the doc feared, not generally, but sometime he worried the boy. "I suppose you'd have to." The trick was not to let him know he was under your skin, and Simon was fair good at hiding his emotions, till it came to River and Kaylee, but they wasn't scary any how. Simon left the room and headed down to the infirmary, wanted to check supplies just in case he'd be needing 'em.

--

When they finally landed Simon thought it best to hang back on the ship with River, rather than walk around and leave himself open to Jayne's attack. The longer he had to wait for it, the more worried and uneasy he got. Maybe that's what Jayne was going for, just psyching the boy out, if he was lucky. But when Simon looked back at his life…how lucky was he really?

--

Jayne wondered around the little town they was in, smiling to himself. He had the best plan there was – ten times better than the doc's own. He'd almost laughed right at the kid when he'd come to say he was sorry.

Didn't matter none. What's done is done, and payback is a'comin'. He knew the doc was worried, 'spose the silence didn't do much.

Well it'd all be over soon and Jayne'd only have to take a few more days a'bein' extra careful to not get shot or nothing so as to stay off the doc's table. Though he kinda held hope that the doc meant no matter what he did, he'd be safe there. Like the boys says, 'he helps people, he doesn't kill them'.

He had an hour or two 'fore he had to be back and get everything all ready, might as well find a whore to spend the time with.

--

When Jayne got back to _Serenity _he rushed up the ramp, where Mal stood with Inara, clearly another sale'd gone awry. Jayne made it to the pair in time to hear Mal tell Inara he wouldn't be making any deals with her type'a folk.

"Mal! Mal, forget my plan." He gave Mal a backhanded slap on the shoulder and great big grin. "Figured something better; now don't go gettin' all mad'er nothin'."

"Is there reason to be mad?" Mal asked, crossing his arms.

"Well it's a mite more…hey doc." Realizing the doc coming out all early could ruin his plan he moved to quickly intercept the boy and move him back to where he couldn't be seen.

"You there, STOP!" an unfamiliar voice shouted. Simon craned his neck to see around the big mercenary who'd stopped walking him backwards. Now standing at the top of the ramp next to Mal and Inara, was a blonde haired man, with a gun, pointed at Jayne's back, "Now raise your hands real slow like." It figured Jayne'd go an' get things all messed up soon as they was fixin' to leave. Both Mal and Inara and Jayne slowly raised their hands up, and before Jayne turned to face the man, Simon was sure he caught sight of a mischievous glean in his eyes. He must'a been fixin' to do something stupid.

The man saw that Simon had yet to raise his hands, and so shouted, "Everyone!" Simon did as he was told, last thing he needed was to be shot. The gun stayed pointed at Simon, "You're hereby bound by law."

"What?" Mal and Simon said together, though Mal's had more of a laughing tone to it. You could see the fear on Simon's face as his eyes darted back on forth, back on forth, from the law-man to Mal and back again. He was wondering what to do about River for certain. He could go along, leave her to Mal's protection, or he could fight him here, maybe get shot for all his trouble.

The Alliance probably didn't care of they got Simon alive or dead, so long as they could continue experiments on River.

"Now," Jayne said, "Don't nobody do nothing rash." He looked pointedly at Mal.

"Oh, you had best be joking me." Mal shot back. He lowered his hands, and looked at Simon. He wanted to let Jayne have his payback, and he sure didn't want look like he was playin' favorites by savin' Simon the fear, they both deserved what the other did to 'em, but this was just foolishness.

That man had a gun, Lord knew if it was loaded; Mal just hoped Jayne'd been smart enough to tell the man to empty the thing beforehand.

Simon was glued to the spot, he hadn't moved since the gun had swung in his direction, and you could see him figurin' what was best to do. And Jayne dropped the smile long enough to look at the younger man as well, and turn back around, an even bigger smile on his face now. Mal was sure the doctor had crapped himself by now. If this were real there wouldn't be no way out of it, the hanger door was wide open and people were milling about a yard or so away.

Mal figured that was about as much torment as the boy deserved.

"You best be shoving off now." Mal said to the blonde haired man.

"I'm not going without him." He said, his eyes still on Simon.

"I said, you best be shoving off now. Jayne?"

"Aw, Mal…"

The blonde haired man turned to look at the two men who had silently said something to each other, as was clear by Jayne's response. And that was what Simon was looking for, he thought it a diversion for him to jump to action.

He attacked the man. Hit him right square in the jaw and sent him to the ground. Mal supposed he should have seen it coming; this was River Tam hanging in the balance. She was that boy's sun.

"Gorramit, he's just playin'!" Jayne said, pushing Simon out of the way to help the man up.

Mal and Inara stood back and Jayne ushered the man down the ramp and back to street tellin' him that he should'a warned him about the kid, sayin'he wasn't all that bright. When he reached the top pf the ramp, Mal pulled him over and whispered harshly in his ear, "That wasn't all to funny, someone could's got hurt. And ain't you already almost cost that boy his sister once? Now I know he knows, don't know how, but I know he does. You think it wise to trick him like this?"

"I don't recall you objectin' to his little plan."

"Oh, I told it was a mistake, but at least he made sure no was to get hurt." With that he walked away, taking Inara with him, leaving Simon standing in the exact position he had been since he'd found it to be a joke.

"I told you I was coming for you." Jayne said remorselessly.

"I just…after Ariel." He looked around; his hands limp at his sides. "You got me. Congratulations, you win."

"'Spose so." Jayne said, closing up the rear hatch, so that the ship would be ready to take off when ready. Simon turned and walked away, he wasn't expecting anything else, and he didn't think it would work but he wanted to try anyway.

He turned to look at Jayne, walking backwards, "Just, wasn't much of trick though was it? Seeing as you've already tried to turn us in for profit before?" and then he turned away from him and walked through the door to the common area.

"Ain't like it was real." Jayne said before climbing up the step to the upper areas of the ship and his bunk. He wasn't to sure why, but he felt he wanted to lay low a bit, but he sure as hell wasn't gonna apologize. Jayne Cobb don't do that, and the kid did a dirty thing and got what was his. Now they'd just fly on like they been.

--

Fin.

It didn't turn out quite the way I thought it would, but I didn't want to have to re-write everything. It looked a little different in my head. Let me know.


End file.
